Love and relationships in the apps’ time.
- Pablo Munoz Psychotherapist
Categories: Mindfulness , Relationship , Self-esteem
I consider myself a tech lover. I love new technology, getting new gadgets, using them. I am amazed of how many things we can do now with a simple Smartphone and how easier it is to do things now if we compare it with how it was few years back. Travel, banking, cooking, accessing information... all it is much easier now. However I also have noticed how now I don’t remember telephone numbers as I did before or how much I don’t pay attention to landmarks when driving, focusing on the GPS.
It is amazing that with a simple click we can achieve a lot of things: getting information, transferring money, fixing photos and we are getting used to it. Unfortunately this is also affecting the way we expect human interactions to be. We now expect immediate changes, reactions or even developing feelings from our relationships.
Now a day we expect things to happen immediately and our waiting capability is diminishing and our tolerance for frustration is getting weaker. While mobile phones are a great way to stay connected and provide hours of entertainment, they are also having a negative effect on our social skills and manners.
I have noticed the sharp decline in the number of people willing to mix and mingle. It’s much easier to sit on your own room and text instead of talking/calling or visiting someone. It is easier to swipe your finger than interact with another human being.
Now we are facing what it is called "the paradox of choice". We have so many options that it is more difficult to decide what I want and then to commit to something or someone. In a study from the University of Wisconsin, researchers found that daters who chose from a small pool of options were more satisfied with their match than those who chose from a large pool; those who chose from a larger pool were more likely to reverse their choice and opt for a new match instead.
Love and relationships require time and effort to develop and to consolidate. Time is one of the most valuable things you could give to anyone especially to your loved ones. In this fast paced life exerting effort to make time for your loved ones makes them feel special, show them that they are a priority to you. It is only fair and needed to receive something similar back for you.
We are living in a world that it is changing with a life style that it is changing and while we should enjoy all this, when it comes to relationships and love look for this 5 characteristics in a person: consistent, available, reliable, responsive and predictable.
Pablo Munoz